I had a trusted sister friend call me a fighter and a scrapper the other day.
She suggested deep down in my heart, if I didn't have anything to fight for, I was lost.
And those words just grabbed a hold of my soul & didn't let go. I initially denied this. I told her I didn't feel like it was me at all. But, those words replay in my head daily. Heck, I've even dreamed about the conversation we had.
Know why? I didn't want to admit this; but, she was right.
I've been feeling very disconnected lately. From myself. From my heart. From my blog. From my friends. From everything
I'm sure there are many reasons for this--my chronic fatigue; the recent appearance of severe allergies; financial woes; my swirling mind, etc. etc. One other reason I couldn't quite put my finger on until my friend gave me that puzzle piece? Because I'm not fighting for anything.
Or am I?
I've always thought fighting had to be hard. Like punching, kicking, and screaming my way out of the corner every time. In fact, I've lived a lot of my life in that way. And burned my body out in the process.
There's a quote out there somewhere saying sometimes fighting isn't so abrasive....it may just be getting up each day & trying again. Well, just getting up and trying has become my mantra...
And while it's great for me in regards to my chronic fatigue (somedays just getting up IS a victory for the day); in regards to my blog/career/life purpose, this mantra leaves me feeling very very uncreative and uninspired.
Maybe fighting though doesn't have to be super violent or energy draining to get the job done.
Maybe fighting is just using the tools you're given to make a statement which inspires, motivates, and propels you forward. Perhaps it's just a realignment of your perspective to create both internal and external change.
And I've got some shifting to do.
While the shifting can take place in many many places in my life, I'm focusing here on the blog. To reignite my game. To reignite my love for creating waffles. To reignite my brain and engage my heart.
So, what exactly am I fighting for while using this platform?
With this blog, I'm fighting to show people cooking in the kitchen can be fun. I'm fighting to show people food doesn't have to be boring to be healthy. I'm showing people what is possible by giving themselves permission to live outside of the boundaries they've placed on themselves. I'm fighting to put fun back into the kitchen and bring your creative dreams to light. I want you to throw diet rules out the window....and fight for the right to hear your body outside of restriction and punishment and deprivation. I want you to hear your own heart beat and listen to what it tells you. I'm fighting for you to come alive. To live beyond fear. To embrace the present moment. To empower yourself to shed the old stories and step into your own life.
See, I've spent a lot of my life searching for a key. One key to unlock the door to everything--happiness, prosperity, love, peace, etc. I always thought, "When I get xyz, then I'll have made it". This was with just about everything in my life--a home, a boyfriend, a job, a fitness regime, a diet, a friend, a raise, a promotion, etc. etc.
The cycle never ended and was exhausting. Each thing I encountered, I would literally ask, "Are you the one? Are you it for me?"
Wow, what a shit ton of pressure I put on myself & on the "thing" I was hunting for in my life. No wonder most of it (*cough* ALL of it *cough*) fell apart. I placed so much pressure on myself and others things naturally crumbled under this gigantic weight. Even me.
So, I gotta get back to the basics. I've made things so complicated I've forgotten my original fight. There is no key. There is no one thing to "save" me. It's the choices I make everyday which lead me to where I'm going.
I am a fighter. I'm wondering, are you a fighter too? What are you fighting for--for yourself, for your business, for your life? Take time to think about your original reasons for fighting, especially if you feel lost. I bet it will rekindle the fire you totally thought was snuffed out.
Because thinking about my original why gave me the spark I needed to step into the kitchen and create these gorgeous hemp waffles.
Yep, hemp. I've been teased for being a hippie/granola and I'm fully embracing it with these waffles. Because they are freaking delicious and healthy. Yes, you can have both of those things at the same time.
And for those who've not yet experimented with hemp, this isn't the stuff which will get you high. I get a lot of questions about that during my day job, so I'm busting this myth now. These are just the seeds of goodness--full of essential fatty acids our body needs to function at its optimal level. Think assisting with heart, brain, and immune system health. They do have a very unique & nutty taste, so flavor your batter accordingly (in this case, I used a whole tablespoon of vanilla extract to mellow out the nuttiness to appeal to my never been exposed to hemp before family). And they all loved it! The smell, the texture, the crunch...they are hemp believers now! My job then for this post is done.
Remember--it's totally cool to be a fighter (because we all are in one way or another); but, not everything has to be a true physical grudge match. Sometimes it really is just reminding yourself of your why....realigning with that why...and moving from that place of realignment.
Let me ask you---where are you moving from these days? Are you aligned with your original idea? Or do you need to remind yourself why you began...and then try again?
Keep going fighter. I believe in you.
adapted from Manitoba Harvest